SevenEleven

in honor of today's date, i propose that all humans on the planet visit their local 7-11, buy a six-pack of 7up and share it with six friends. that sounds like an exciting day. i love exciting stuff like that. daily, i sit around, thinking up really exciting, weird stuff to do. i enjoy being productive, you know.

now, for those of you that actually notice and pay attention to insignificant details, you may have noted that in my previous proposition, it leaves one person with no refreshing beverage. i really have no intelligent response to that, or to anything else, for that matter, since my mind is in an excellerated zen-state right now. i feel like there is no true solution to the problem, since there is no such thing as a seven-pack of soda. i mean, what can you do? in addition, since the host is responsible for the comfort of the guests, he or she should be the one to do without; so, no soda for you, live with it!

you may ask, "well, why bother with all this seven-up crap just because it's 7-11?" i asked myself that question, too. i mean, why bother? who really cares about ceremony, anyway? do i care? i'm not sure that i do. wait, though, it can't be as simple as that. i am the one that raised the whole issue, right? so i must have had a reason, right? right? well, i thought about it quite awhile and as it turns out, i did have a reason. but it's not the reason most people would think. the reason that i came up with "the 7up proposition/ceremony" is......ahem, drumroll, please.....

i was bored.

what?

i know what you're thinking. i know exactly what you're thinking. that has got to be the stupidest reason you've ever heard of for doing anything! hang on a sec, now. if you believe that, you weren't really thinking back, deep into your past, into the deep recesses of your gray matter. if you had, you would discover that is certainly not true; on the contrary, boredom can be one of the most productive mind-states in the universe!

c'mon, do it, think back, when you were a kid... there you were, sitting on the late summer sidewalk, nothing to do, nowhere to go, no hope of entertainment whatsoever in your near future. “should i go inside and call it a day, just watch tv? nah, too boring. should i get my bike out and ride around town? nah, too hot, too boring. should i walk down the street to peek in the shops downtown? nah, seen all that stuff a million times over. crap, this is boring!” it's all been done. there's nothing new to do in the universe. life is fully mundane. so, you sit there, racking your brain, searching desperately for something to do, something, anything! "it's so unfair! i hate being bored."

you stare down at the sidewalk. a bug meanders around you. “hmm...where's he going. at least he has something to do, lucky bug! think i'll follow him, nothing else to do, right? wow, he's gross looking. where's he going?” you follow the bug, he creeps along, slowly, on the hot pavement. you wonder, “why doesnt he burn his little feet, mine are burning? hmm, what kind of bug is he?” you run into the house and get your book about bugs and look him up. “hey, he's a kind of cricket! wierd.” you look for more bugs in the book, you flip over rocks, looking for them, new ones, weirder ones, flying, crawling, creepy ones and soon....you're not so bored, you're intrigued! the afternoon slowly drifts by into a lazy summer evening and becomes...the summer you learned alot about bugs.

boredom is a higher state of consciousness.

that reminds me, I’m kinda thirsty…